whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize