Her vagina should come with caution tape.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
