Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
