I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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