She's JV to your varsity
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
