I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Randomize
