Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
How does it feel to date your dad?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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