OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
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