So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize