I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize