I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
