well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
