Having a random hookup so left but love u
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
