i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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