Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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