i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
be right there i have to get my cape
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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