Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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