I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
