then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
We need to get me chipped asap
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
