If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
