You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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