Kiss
Puke
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I need help removing her.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
