I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
We are all done wearing pants today
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
