this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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