so that wasnt chicken after all
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
