GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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