My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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