Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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