New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Randomize
