I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
