so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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