WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
