what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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