is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
