id be glad to
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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