Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
