I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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