i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Just puked most of my soul out..
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