I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
