That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
