They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
