And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
