we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I just sucked dick on a ferry
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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