is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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