remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize