Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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