Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
your room smells of hookers.
And success
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
