Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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