Its about making memories worth repressing
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
