I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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