aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
